Pay Attention to What She Does, Not What She Says
Regardless of what she says, your girl hates boring. She wants excitement and intrigue.
Author: Ryan Felman
Writer, Spartan Racer, Self-Improvement Coach
Your relationship has gotten monotonous, predictable, unexciting. Not good. Every man has experienced this. Where there used to be sparks and electricity, now there is a dead bedroom.
Don't freak out! This isn't that hard to fix. In fact, this will also help you in making your own life more interesting.
I went on a trip a few weekends ago. It was for work and it meant I would be out of town for a couple nights. I extended this an extra night to go see an old friend who now lives in California. I rarely get the opportunity to hang out with him, so I made it work.
As old friends tend to do, we went out drinking and laughing and had a good time. Believe it or not, my life isn't full of obstacle course races and copywriting. Although, I did run a mud run the morning before driving to see my friends.... Anyway!
When I came back, my girlfriend was a little annoyed that I had gone out drinking. Not pissed, but she made a couple passive aggressive comments about how I went out drinking and having fun the whole trip. I did, but I also signed up a new client, saw old clients and drove 1,500 miles over the course of like 3 days. But I shrugged it off. Do you know why?
Her actions spoke louder than words. She was more adoring, more friendly, and much more liberal with her casual touching throughout the last couple weeks. She's been talking about how much she loves me and smiling more often. And of course she's been more passionate at night. Now why is she acting this way?
Well, because I shook up her routine. In long term relationships, things become predictable and boring. Regardless of what she says, your girl hates boring. She wants excitement and intrigue. She wants you to be interesting. She wants to see you getting out and fulfilling your mission!
Obviously I didn't do anything wrong while out of town. Although there was an opportunity with a pretty, long-haired blonde. She doesn't know about her, but she's surely wondering if I'm happy enough to stay faithful. Which I am, but this makes for a healthy dynamic.
You don't want your girl to be insecure unless you want a psychotic mess on your hands. But you do want her to know that you're a man with options. A man worth pursuing. A man who is desirable.
How do you stay desirable?
For starters, you need to take care of your appearance. Stay in shape or get in shape. Take care of basic grooming. This shaggy beard trend doesn't work unless you neatly trim it. Look to Rugged Legacy for more on that.
Dress like an actual adult. Lose the graphic tees and sports jerseys. You look like that dweeb in GTA V. Wear basic clothes that fit. You can't go wrong with a henley or a nice button down. Especially if you're in shape.
Shake up your routine. This can be done by going to the gym more often. Or waking up early for a run.
Hit the gym. If you're upset about a little weight gain from your partner, start losing weight yourself. You'll be surprised how often your girl will want to keep up her appearance as you get in shape. This is great and healthy for both of you.
Or start a new hobby. Maybe you take up kayaking or bowling. The dude abides. Whatever. Just quit being boring!
Get out of town for a couple days. This is best done for work. This gives your girl a chance to miss you and appreciate all that you do while home. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. And often times I see guys make themselves all too available. You need to be living your own life away from your girl. Give her a chance to miss you.
If you'd like to learn more about becoming a more interesting man, then check out my book, Reclaim Your Manhood. I used to be living a boring and average life.
I spent my weekends playing fantasy football, drinking beer and eating chicken wings. Now I run obstacle course races, take martial arts and write on a website that I built. You too can make your life more interesting.
If you enjoyed this article, then you'll love the private group for highly motivated men. Click here to apply for membership.
Find brotherhood in The Spartan Tribe!
The handbook for young men everywhere who are lost and need direction and guidance in life.
It is never too late to change your life. What can you do today to improve yourself?
This book will
- Help you create your life mission
- Understand red flags in women
- Develop healthy habits
- Gain self-confidence
- Become a more interesting man
- Live a life of excellence
Challenge yourself by reading this book and implement its advice into your own life. I have 20 steps here for the modern man to make meaningful changes to his life as well as details about how to take these steps and put them into action.
Change your mindset. Change your life.
Society needs warriors to step up.
This is the Private Telegram Channel for Motivated Men who Embrace Traditional Masculinity.
You wouldn't go to war by yourself, so why do you attack your life by yourself?
You need a support network of strong and motivated men that can help you.
By forming a tribe of men, a brotherhood, you will be inspired to live up to the standards that these men set forth in their own lives. A rising tide lifts all ships.
These men will keep you strong when life can make you feel weak. These men will serve as a powerful network of references, opportunities and collaborators.
These men will hold you accountable and assure you stay on the right path.
What's Included in the Spartan Tribe?
A newfound brotherhood with access to this exclusive men's club
A complimentary copy of Reclaim Your Manhood
Access to a network of highly motivated men that share tips and advice
A complimentary copy of The Warrior's Mindset
The Premium Path To Manliness Newsletter
Monthly Group Zoom calls
What do we talk about here?
Well, masculinity for starters. Fitness. Money and ideas for making money. Most importantly, this will be a high energy group of people that you can depend on for inspiration, motivation and advice. While most of your friends are complaining about missing their sports or gaming all day, this will be a group for real players in the world. Do not join if you are only going to talk baseball stats or the latest video game.
Discover how you can improve your lifestyle by building a side-income
Become stronger, healthier and more motivated with better routines
Network with like-minded individuals and form your own band of brothers
Deprogram yourself from feminized society and embrace your masculinity
When I think of the most interesting people I know, it’s not the hyper-specialized experts in one field. It’s the people who find a unique juxtaposition of different walks of life. I’m drawn to those who can be both physically fit and intelligent enough to write. Two skills that are not that common alone but uniquely rare when found in the same person.