How to Get a Girl to Notice You
Quit Waiting for Her to Notice You
Every relationship I’ve ever had started with fireworks. By the end of the first or second time I saw the girl, I made a move.
“They say that every relationship is made in the first five minutes. Now whatever happens in those five minutes, that’s the dynamic between the two.”
Here is why Making a Move Right Away is Brilliant
First off, it’s always better to get what you want sooner than later right? But this is even more important. What if she’s’ just not that into you. The brilliance in making a move early is you save yourself all the time and heartache of having to wonder for months, or Odin forbid, years. This is time that you will NEVER get back.
Too many guys will let a girl string them along because they’re so afraid of rejection that they would rather spend literal years in a purgatory of lust than deal with the quick and painful knowledge that they aren’t wanted. Don’t worry about the girls that aren’t interested in you. Move on fast so you can sooner find one who wants to spend time with you.
And the longer you wait to make your move, the harder it becomes. One, she likely doesn’t see you that way since you’ve become her friend for so long. And two, you’ve built it up too much in your head. All the anticipation and waiting has made you more nervous and more awkward.
Make Your Intentions Clear!
I feel this needs some nuance because some guys will take this the wrong way. When I say you need to make a move, I am not saying to force your tongue down a woman’s throat because she complimented your hair. What I am saying is to make your intentions clear! That means instead of waiting for some perfect moment, you need to start off being a little flirty right off the bat. Don’t conceal your intentions. This is where so many guys foul up.
If you are simply waiting for the right moment or letting fear get in the way of you making a move, you’re going to slide into the dreaded “friend zone.” It’s easy to do and can happen faster than you’d expect. When you are always hanging around but not initiating any contact or stirring up excitement, you’ll find her interest in you turning to friendship. And contrary to what the media and society will tell you, most people don’t want to date their best friend.
“So how’d you meet?”
“Well, I kept seeing this guy like all my Instagram posts so after 3 months of his pathetic comments under all my pics I asked him out.”
This has literally never happened to anyone ever in the history of social media. She may even “like” your pathetic comments with heart emojis that you leave, but she’s DMing the guy that she’s really interested in about how pathetic it is. Trust me on this one. I’ve seen the DMs saying exactly this.
If you don’t want her to categorize you as just another friend, you need to flirt with her. You should be making subtle but appropriate contact. Simply putting your hand on her arm as you say something is a good signal. Her body language will make her interest in you clear. Does she move away from your touch? Or does she respond by smiling and tilting her head?
Signs She’s Interested in You:
Prolonged eye contact. Over 3 seconds (The Netflix Rule)
Touching you with her hands or body
Positioning her shoulders or feet towards you
Head tilting during a conversation (I don’t trust this one, but it can signal attraction)
Flipping her hair or playing with her hair
Looking at your lips or biting her lips
Obviously, none of these are hard and fast rules. There may be extenuating circumstances that prevent her from engaging with you despite being interested. Maybe she has a boyfriend. Maybe she doesn’t want to leave her friend. Maybe she feels bloated that day and today is not the best day.
You’ll Be Surprised how effective this is though. If you pay more attention to her actions, her body language and her expression, then you’ll begin to get better at detecting interest.
Don’t Put Her on the Pedestal
The girls you lust after are magic. You don’t really know her yet, so she hasn’t had a chance to disappoint you or annoy you yet. You don’t know if she has terrible mood swings. Maybe she wants to go out with her friends and come home wasted every weekend. She might be a terrible driver. But since you’ve only engaged from a distance, you only see what she wants you to see.
You let your imagination fill in the blanks and you end up building her into this ideal woman that no one can possibly be. This also makes you feel like you don’t deserve her. Instead of telling yourself that she’s this perfect woman that you don’t deserve, you should be focusing on whether she would be a good fit for your life.
It is much easier for women to get the interest of a man than vice versa, but they struggle in picking a worthy man. This is why women tend to be more discerning and uninterested when a man approaches. But men typically have to work harder to get a woman’s attention. Instead of wondering if this girl would even be a net positive to your life, you find yourself desperately trying to win over her interest. It can almost become a game and the idea of winning takes over your sense of logic. Rather than simply assuming she would make your life better, you need to be sure. Check out these red flags to watch out for in you don’t know what to look for.
The wrong woman can wreck your life like you wouldn’t believe. There are women out there who are just looking for some sucker to spend money on them. Damaged women who will cheat on you and then blame you. And there are women out there who will make your life easier and better. So, make sure you find a woman who will help you on your mission and bring joy to your life.
Adopt the Abundance Mindset
The best way to attract more high value women into your life is to become a high value man. It really is that simple. Get yourself in better shape, dress like you care about yourself and lead an interesting life.
If you spend your weekends pounding cheap beers and playing Call of Duty with your bros online, you’re not going to stand out from the sea of average dudes doing the same thing. You need to find more interesting hobbies and activities. Get involved with the community. Go on bike rides or runs. You’ll find that if you can remove yourself from your routine of binge gaming, binge watching and binge drinking, you can become a much more interesting person. If you’re lost on how to get started, check out this guide on becoming a better man.
There’s very little competition if you can find a little motivation inside of you. And best yet, you’ll be happier and more confident with yourself by adopting these better habits. This creates a positive feedback loop. You’ll feel better about yourself and carry this confidence with you. People will be attracted to you and this will motivate you to keep up with your new lifestyle.
If you enjoyed this, then you’ll love my FREE newsletter where I offer advice on becoming a better man and much more. You can sign up for it here and get a FREE eBook!
The handbook for young men everywhere who are lost and need direction and guidance in life.
It is never too late to change your life. What can you do today to improve yourself?
This book will
- Help you create your life mission
- Understand red flags in women
- Develop healthy habits
- Gain self-confidence
- Become a more interesting man
- Live a life of excellence
Challenge yourself by reading this book and implement its advice into your own life. I have 20 steps here for the modern man to make meaningful changes to his life as well as details about how to take these steps and put them into action.
Change your mindset. Change your life.
If you want to forge your own tribe, learn how to get noticed by big accounts with The Path to Twitter Dominance.
Unlock the insider secrets to growing a following
Fix your profile (most of you do this wrong)
Understand how to get noticed in the DMs
Why you need to start an email list
How you can hook new followers with your pinned tweet
Learn how to stand out online
When I think of the most interesting people I know, it’s not the hyper-specialized experts in one field. It’s the people who find a unique juxtaposition of different walks of life. I’m drawn to those who can be both physically fit and intelligent enough to write. Two skills that are not that common alone but uniquely rare when found in the same person.